I often find myself apologizing to my mother for my childhood. It’s not that I was a horrible child….it’s more that I realize now that there are things that I could have never understood until I became a mother myself.
I’m sorry that I sang the music from “The Little Mermaid” until you were crazy, and then some.
I’m sorry I laughed at your funny jokes at home, but not in front of my friends.
I’m sorry I didn’t understand why I couldn’t hang out at the mall.
I’m sorry for the eye rolls.
I’m sorry that it was soooooooooo annoying the way you cried all the time. Like….All. The. Time.
I get it now.
Today after picking Violet up from her father’s house we decided to go to the movies. Violet’s very first movie in the theater. It seemed fitting that she wear her Cinderella dress to go see the live action Cinderella movie. We were a little bit late, but made it *just in time* for the Frozen short in the beginning. Violet sat on the very edge of her seat utterly amazed by her favorite animated friends doing something new.
I was just so happy that she was so happy. And I was so happy that we were having special girl time together because I miss her terribly when we are apart. I pulled myself together…and the show went on.
In the movie, Ella’s mother told her to have courage, and to be kind, and to believe in magic. Then she asked for Ella to forgive her for getting sick. I cried again. My goodness the feels….
When Ella lost her father…tears again. It’s a whimsical family movie for God’s sake! What is wrong with me?
Violet watched in amazement as the fairy godmother appeared. She hid her eyes when the pumpkin turned into the coach and then clapped her hands when she saw the result. She gasped at the beautiful dress that sparkled and then twirled around in her own blue sparkle dress. As Ella and the prince danced at the ball, Violet danced too….in the aisle. When the movie ended with its magical happy ending Violet didn’t want to leave until the music ended, because we had to dance.
As the lights came on I quickly wiped the tears away, as to not look ridiculous for crying at the happy ending that my happy princess thoroughly enjoyed. This little impromptu date ended up being a special memory that I will always keep. At the end of the movie Violet turned to me and said, “Mom! This is great!”
Today I remembered why it’s important to let our kids enjoy wonder and fantasy. It’s important that they enjoy dreaming of the happy ending and feeling beautiful like the mystery princess at the ball. And while they play and imagine they build courage and kindness and learn to believe in a little bit of magic. Hopefully the courage, kindness and magic will be enough to carry them through all of the dark times that we cannot see them through.
One thing that I know for sure: I will always let her dance.
And hopefully Violet will forgive me for all of the crying.